Beige Renegade

So, this post was supposed to be about this incred oversized twill jacket. Doubtless you'll have spied it on Ellen and Queen C (as I did) and thought, 'let me at it'. I was buzzing to track it down in H&M at Oxford Circus, an even more excited to flex my Elle discount card at the till. But when it came to shooting, however, my heart was rapidly broken. In short- it looked absolutely minging on me. (I realise this keeps happening, and I keep having make excuses for my inate lack of- well- everything. A rethink is deffo in order, along with a diet and possibly, a dramatic haircut). I ended up taking off said jacket and snapping in just a vest and skinnies. Can you imagine what would Miranda Priestly say? Exactly. But don't let me put you off. It's just the most on-point, oversized shape in the history of the world evvvvah. And Ellen and Camy prove it. Thank you and goodnight.
Jacket- H&M//Vest- Zara
Skinnies- Zara//Flats- Mango//Hat- H&M



Hauls, Boys And Life, Actually

I love a life update post, don't you? So much so, that I thought I'd throw my hat into the ring and attempt to spill (hopefully in a mildly diverting manner) on what's going down wit' me. So, first up-
Life As We Know It
My health, unfortunately, continues to dominate my existence. I've never been an "ill" person, and having to deal on a daily basis with so many difficult issues has left me in despair much of the time. *Soz to start on a downer, but let's get this shit out the way first. Health Problem 1: my eyes are still severely fucked up. When they say blepharitis is incurable, they really mean it. My day begins with rounds of eye cleaning, massage and eye drops. It's massively time consuming and massively annoying. I've basically forgotten what it's like to look and feel 'normal'. I miss wearing make-up so much (and in one of many illogical moves- I just keep buying the stuff-  but it's an oddly pleasurable torment all the same). There's no respite anywhere with bleph as heat, light, darkness, food and just about everything else trigger unbelievably painful symptoms. Also, having to take 'conventional' medication troubles me greatly- I'd love to stop as I want to try and heal properly and 'eat myself well', but I get scared every time I attempt to phase out my tablets. Plus, there's a money factor to all this- one that exacerbates my stress even more- every single eye cream, lotion, wipe, tablet and drop costs a freaking bomb. Some of that stuff is available on the NHS, some ain't. 
Then there's Health Problem 2: my brain infection. In 2013 I contracted a virus that affects the part of your brain where it meets the inner ear. It affects your balance and makes you feel shit. The symptoms are similar to those of Lyme disease (and if you know anything about that you'll know it's utterly terrifying). The best way I can describe it is when you're walking forwards, it feels like you're walking sideways. You feel drunk at best, and on a bad acid trip at worst. And in the last few weeks it's returned to haunt me. I had to have rehab in 2014 to help me walk again in a 'balanced' way, and now I'm feeling so devastated that it's back to blight my life. The only thing that relieves the symptoms is lying down and sleeping, and I have to fight the whole day not to give into that urge. I have zero energy and wake up knackered. Most days I honestly don't know how or why I even get out of bed at all. And then there's Health Problem 3: about a month ago I cracked my front tooth. I looked like an old gypsy. And after 3 rounds of dental work (drilling, injections, the whole nine yards- and a hefty bill of £500) I'm now the owner a new gnasher. One that is.....a completely different sodding colour to the rest of my teeth. The dentist has said it will 'settle down' and blend in more after a few weeks, but I'm doubting that. I can't actually face getting it done again- but I can't go around looking like Worzel Gummidge either. Don't get me wrong- I know there's people out there with way worse problems, and lots more pain than me, I'm just not the kind of person who can 'power through' their problems. And speaking of problems (which I very much have been doing) let's move onto:
Unsurprisingly (I guess), I don't have a boyfriend. I can almost hear Lloyd Grossman now "Who'd go out with a girl with a face like this?". (Feeling ya Lloyd). In many ways, being ill has taken me so far out of the dating game it's actually a relief. There is a manchild, however, I like. A lot. I met him about 18 months ago and if you look up 'bad boy' in the dictionary you will doubtless see his beautiful little face staring back at you. I like that we're a mismatch, I like that he's too young for me and I like that he's trouble with a capital T. I think of him daily. I stalk him on FB. (Obvs). I was *this close* the other day to liking one of his extremely frequent selfies. (In love with himself he certainly is). But what would that achieve? Absolutely nothing (I think). Sure, he might respond. But how could I possibly meet him looking like this? Could I kiss him when he still smokes and I've had to give up? (Actually, imbibing 2nd hand tobacco sounds quite appealing come to think of it). I can't drink, I can't eat out, I can't even go to the cinema (the extreme dark and light hurts my eyes). And not that he'd go- but I doubt I'll ever see the inside of a theatre again either (ref: cinema for explanation). All routes of being social and of being normal, are cut-off for me. The only things I can do are work, walk, and shop. Which brings me to:
So I've been prattling on for hours now when all you wanna really know about is these shoes, right? Heaven aren't they? There was no point (boom boom) me buying them as the only time I'll wear them is on doctors appointments, but I desperately need little hits like this to cheer me up at the moment. So I went for it. If I hadn't had to pay for my tooth you may well be looking at pictures of a Chloé Faye instead. But the God Of Canines wants me to spend my dollar elsewhere. The bastard, eh? Catch you soon xx

Shoes- Topshop//Jeans- H&M//Jazzy Cushion & Picture Frame- Ikea



Can I Kick It?

I bought these little kick flares from Zara last year, and I super-pleased that I did. Turns out, they're much easier to wear than the full-blown, full-length, big voluminous versions flying around (with which I'm still struggling majorrrly- I think it's a shoe thing. Mostly). I've paired them here with a striped shirt (also old) and it's deffo revived my love for a preppy button-down. I can't resist a bit of seersucker and pretending I'm slightly Euro, that I holiday at the Cala Di Volpe and that I'm distantly related to Lilly Pulitzer. Back in the real world I stand in an alleyway (to the bemusement of everyone that passes by) and engage in a series of Artful Dodger poses (Oi! Oi!). Reasoning: to show that baby flare off to its best advantage. If you're feeling a pair of starter flares then these are dope, and these look kinda nice too. Catch you soon xx
PS Uggghh- you know when you do a shoot and your eyes are half closed in every single frame? That was me, doing this. PPS Yes, there is some jean-wrinklage going on. Soz for that. They are a nice fit, I'm just a mess. I think I need to get on these incred photoshopping tips from Stephanie ASAP. 
Shirt- Topshop//Jeans- Zara
Hat- H&M//Sneaks- Adidas


I've Joined The Revolution

For the longest time I've wanted to try Makeup Revolution. But because I'm not supposed to be wearing make-up (due to my eye problems) I've resisted jumping on the hype thus far. However, a couple of weeks ago I found myself in Superdrug on Oxford Street and the unbelievable array of products therein was all too tempting, so I leapt. My whole haul came to seventeen pounds. Seventeen! I know! Normally I'd happily splash that on one product, (and er, possibly even double that). So what did I get? I went for two foundations, two powders, a concealer and two of their infamous palettes. Anddd, the judges scores are in:
The Foundations
These are probably the most disappointing products in my haul. The consistency is thin and watery and there's just not much doing with them at all. Next!
The Powders
These are wayyy more successful a purchase. I bought the translucent shade for my all-over base colour, and it leaves a good matte finish. I then use the 'Bronzer Kiss' shade to warm things up again (across the cheeks and forehead) and it's definitely a nice medium hue with no shimmer. Winning.
The Concealer
This I have to confess I found quite difficult to use. The blendability just isn't there, and the shade I went for (MC 02 Fair) just doesn't work for my skin. It deffo feels like a £1 product, but I am keen to try a concealer palette though as they look ace.
The Palettes
Moving onto the big guns- I scooped up the Essential Matte one that everyone raves about. And yep, the hype is real. You literally cannot go wrong. There's just something so heavenly about these. And it's such a huge range, honestly and truly if I could wear eye make-up I'd get every single one. Swear down. I also tried a blusher palette (in Hot Spice). Again, the product is properly pigmented and looks and feels so nice to use. I literally can't wait to buy some more. See you in Superdrug :)) *Soz about my swatching skillz.
All make-up by MakeUp Revolution from Superdrug


Black Heart, White Jeans

My mum has a thing for white jeans. She's always banging on about "channelling her inner Liz Hurley". And whilst Elizabeth H isn't even remotely verging on being a style icon for me (soz mum- and indeed- Liz) I'm deffo feeling drawn to a paler palette lately. Thus I found myself in Zara (where else) trying on these. Straight away I was sold (despite the rips- which I'm kinda over). Although I've gone for black errrything else here I'm actually in the mindset of a Kardashian-At-Easter and feeling all-white outfits atm. Naturally, the first day I wore these (in a non-blogging sense) I got them dirty. And the accompanying white tee I was wearing too. And there's the rub. I think it's gonna be a Bold-3-in-1 kinda summer. Catch you soon xx
PS Apologies for the smug/half-dead/make-up-less face in Pic 4 (and just generally)
Jeans- Zara//Sweatshirt- Zara
Fedora- H&M//Sneaks- Adidas
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